Our oldest was a picture perfect baby girl named Bree who came into this world surrounded by chaos and in her very own way. Nothing was as expected from this pregnancy and delivery I had suffered from preterm labor around 28 weeks and was placed on bed rest. Bree ended coming four weeks early, sunny side up, the epidural didn’t work, cord was wrapped around her neck, jaundice, NICU. However, she was the sweetest happiest baby always full of drama and smiles. It’s funny how the birth of each child ultimately gives a glimpse into their personalities. She is now seven years old thriving in school and surrounded by the chaos of two younger brothers on the spectrum and still doing everything her own happy way. Bree is a smart, strong, sassy, sensitive and the best big sister around.
Our middle child Tyler completely different birth long, right on time but pretty easy. I remember thinking I’m allowed to hold him now. Are you sure you don’t want to clean him first? He was a bruiser at 9.5 lbs and gaining two lbs before we even left the hospital. He was happy and healthy, but I always had a feeling he was just a bit different from his older sister. I suffered from postpartum anxiety after this delivery and it was not easy. I had a great support system and I made it through. Although I still suffer from anxiety today I think it just comes along with being a mom!
Tyler was a very different baby from his sister not in a bad way just he was happy sitting in a pack n play watching a movie. He was the easiest baby always content. He was often hard to connect with he didn’t want to read books with us, he really wasn’t interested and playing with toys the way his sister did. When we tried to get him to engage in these activities the way his sister did he would just scream. He never made eye contact or responded to his name. He never babbled and by the age of one we knew it was time to reach out for help. Tyler started early intervention at fifteen months. At the age of two he was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (more on this in another post!) Tyler is now four years old a happy, energetic, smart, talkative preschooler. Tyler has taught me more about life, patience, and parenting than I can begin to explain.
Last but, definitely not least our youngest son Joey he was born two weeks late after months of preterm labor and contractions. It was actually a very easy labor epidural worked, so we were off to a great start. In similar fashion to his sister, he chooses to flip sunny side up at the last minute. Heart rate dropped ok, we know the drill cord wrapped around the neck just like his sister. Nope, Joey entered the world in his own dramatic fashion with a knot in the actual umbilical cord. He was totally fine nurses and doctors were in complete amazement over the knot apparently, it’s not all that common. He was a bruiser 9.9 lbs just a bit bigger than his brother! Joey was a cuddle bug right from the start always needed me to hold and bounce him otherwise all he did was scream. He didn’t sleep through the night until around age two.
As a third-time parent, you think ok, we got this, not with this one. I felt like a first-time mom only with two younger kids to take care of. Today Joey is 2.5 and like his brother was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum at the age of 2. Joey presented much different than Tyler, Joey made great eye contact, played with toys, had some words, babbled until around ten months he then just started to regress. He had RSV so, I was hoping it was due to the constant illnesses that we always seemed to catch but at fifteen months he wasn’t walking so we contacted early intervention (EI) and are currently using EI as well as intensive home ABA therapy. Today Joey is very happy, healthy, still sweet, cuddly and clingy just like the day he was born.
All three kids are unique and have very different personalities needs, and wants. It is very difficult to balance the needs of all three kids effectively. Sometimes I think we should be saving towards psychologist payments instead of college. I mean they can always try for a scholarship for college. Some days I feel like I can’t meet the needs of one of them let alone three so, maybe one day they can show these blog posts to their therapist and say this is why I’m here!
1 thought on “The Kids background”
Hi again. Your situation is different to mine in different ways, but I can relate to so much of what you are writing about. I have 3 children too, my Middle son is recently diagnosed as having ASD and SPD and my youngest possibly has SPD that last part about barely managing to meet one of their needs let alone rings so true. It’s so nice to know we’re not alone in this. Stay string mama. Cherrysnotmyname 🍒
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